According to the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence, more than 10 million women and men have experienced physical abuse by an intimate partner[1]. This number doesn’t include the men and women in relationships with verbal and psychological abuse, which would make the figure higher. Some abusers even cite the verse stating a woman should submit to her husband as an excuse for his behavior. Conveniently, they have forgotten that the Bible also says husbands should love their wives as Christ loves the church.
But abuse isn’t limited to adults, it also affects our children. According to the National Children’s Alliance, in 2015, an estimated 1,670 children died from abuse and neglect in the United States[2]. An estimated 683,000 children were victims of abuse and neglect in 2015. Of the children who experienced maltreatment or abuse, three-quarters suffered neglect; 17.2%suffered physical abuse; and 8.4% suffered sexual abuse. Those figures add up to more than 100% because some children experience more than one type of abuse.In 78.1% of the substantiated cases of child maltreatment, a parent of the child victim was the perpetrator.
So what can we do as Christians? We can control how we act, but we can’t control how others act. But perhaps it’s our limitations that do the most good. Because when we realize we’re limited, we seek the One Who isn’t.
Prayer is the only remedy I have besides being there for the victims, listening to them when they tell you what’s happening. Helping them as they heal. Supporting them in their decisions, even when we don’t agree with them.
That’s the hard part for me, always has been. I used to work at a domestic violence shelter, and when the women would go back into an abusive relationship, it broke my heart. But at the end of the day, their life isn’t in my hands, it’s in God’s.
Now that I no longer work there, I sometimes wonder if I’m around more survivors than I realize. Because they look the same as us. They hide their physical bruises and their scars just like we do our emotional ones. It reminds me that you never truly know what a person is going through, only God does, and I must not judge.
So let’s pray for the men, women, and children in abusive relationships. Let’s pray for healing. For the victim and, although difficult, the abuser. Let’s pray the abuser comes to know Christ, that he/she is changed from the inside out. And if you need something physical to do, volunteer at your local domestic violence shelter or group home. Give them a call and ask what donations you need. Your simple act of kindness can have a ripple effect that you’ll likely never know about. But we aren’t kind for our glory. We’re kind for His glory.
Let’s teach our children what love looks like. Teach them how to deal with their anger. Let’s teach them how to treat their spouse. And let’s pray they remember those lessons and they enter into safe and healthy relationships.
References
[1] NCADV | National Coalition Against Domestic Violence https://ncadv.org/statistics
NCADV | National Coalition Against Domestic Violence
[2]National Statistics on Child Abuse http://www.nationalchildrensalliance.org/media-room/nca-digital-media-kit/national-statistics-on-child-abuse/
National Statistics on Child Abuse
