Just a Thought: The True Meaning of Love

I was standing in the bedroom doorway looking at my grandmothers when I heard it. God’s voice came to me loud and clear. “They’ve done so much for you. Now it’s your turn to do something for them.” It was a truth I’d been dodging for quite some time. I wanted to be a normal teenager, whatever that is. I wanted my biggest concern to be whether or not I had a date to prom, not changing my grandmothers’ diapers and fielding the inevitable questions: When am I going home? Won’t you take me home? I didn’t want to admit my grandmothers were fading right before my eyes, that their diseases were taking over.

But God’s message was loud and clear. It was time for me to serve them. I wasn’t perfect at it. I often lost my temper. Complained. Grew frustrated. But I’d hear that admonition over and over again: “It’s your turn.” I’d remind myself that my grandmothers didn’t know what they were saying, that dementia was stealing their minds. Day after day I had to make a choice to do the best I could for my grandmothers. To serve them even though they had no idea what I was doing. Even though they didn’t understand they needed care.

It was then I learned the true meaning of love: doing something for someone knowing that they may never thank you, repay you, acknowledge you, or know what you’ve done. Love isn’t a feeling. It’s a series of actions. It’s a series of decisions. It’s a choice.

1 Corinthians 13 is often called “the love chapter,” and many use it as a reference when they explain biblical love. But I grew up using KJV, and I was always confused because the word “love” is not used in the King James but instead “charity.” So one day, fueled by curiosity, I looked up the etymology (or word history) of the word “charity.” According to my research in the Oxford English Dictionary, at the time the King James Bible was translated (the early 1600s), “charity” was widely used in the sense of Christ-like love and affection and alms-giving. The Greek word “agape” used in 1 Corinthians 13 means “affection or benevolence” according to Strong’s Concordance. I imagine the translators chose “charity” because Christ-like love is benevolent.

In fact, if you replace the word “charity” with “Jesus,” the passage remains true.

Jesus suffereth long and is kind; Jesus envieth not…

And since 1 John 4:8 says “God is love,” it makes sense that Jesus would embody everything in the “love chapter.” Especially since alms-giving, the definition of charity to this day, involves sacrificing something of ourselves, and Christ sacrificed Himself for us.

So in order to love others, we must serve others. To show Christ-like love, we must become servants and follow his example. Matthew 23:11-12 says, “But he that is greatest among you shall be your servant. And whosoever shall exalt himself shall be abased; and he that shall humble himself shall be exalted.” Christ, the greatest among us, came to Earth as a servant. So how can we expect to be any less? Christ came knowing the world would turn on Him, but He came anyway. He died knowing not everyone would come to Him, but He died anyway. He served even though He knew He would not be served. He deserved to sit on a throne with a crown of gold but instead He hung on a cross with a crown of thorns, and that is the attitude we should seek to emulate when loving others. Because service isn’t about reward or praise of this world. Service is about sacrifice. Service without love is nothing, just as faith without works is dead (James 3:15-17).

Our role model for service and love is Jesus Christ. Mark 10:45 says, “For even the Son of man came not to be ministered unto, but to minister, and to give his life a ransom for many.” In His service, we find love. In His sacrifice, we find love. In His life, we find love. And as children of God, we are called to show that love to others. Not just to our spouses and our family, but to our neighbors and our enemies. To the random faces we pass on the street. You never know when the love you show could change a person’s life. In a world of selfishness, people need to see selflessness. They need to see sacrifice. They need to see benevolence.

They need to see Christ.